Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
