So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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