Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
