i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
