she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
