I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Sober January is a disaster.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Randomize
