Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
