A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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