garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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