Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
