If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I love you.
Bad choice
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
