Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize