What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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