Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.

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(512): dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce. http://tfl.nu/89y8

Replies (11) Good night (990) Bad night (3352)
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(707): View more from California

I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.

(951): View more from California

That's the thing about women.

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(707): I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff. (951): That's the thing about women. http://tfl.nu/3r0z

Replies (6) Good night (840) Bad night (2496)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...

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(920): once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore... http://tfl.nu/uw33

Replies (29) Good night (4690) Bad night (1081)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea

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(978): I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea http://tfl.nu/kyal

Replies (28) Good night (3679) Bad night (1299)
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(440): View more from Ohio

Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.

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(440): Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place. http://tfl.nu/kait

Replies (25) Good night (24065) Bad night (1252)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.

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(610): all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville. http://tfl.nu/k1x4

Replies (6) Good night (8225) Bad night (1711)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..

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(843): Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming.. http://tfl.nu/kfd5

Replies (49) Good night (2984) Bad night (5177)
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(406): View more from Montana

Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar

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(406): Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar http://tfl.nu/9n3o

Replies (6) Good night (1404) Bad night (634)
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(517): View more from Michigan

Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.

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(517): Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember. http://tfl.nu/2slr

Replies (13) Good night (2642) Bad night (775)
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(423): View more from Tennessee

I will cut you

(1-423): View more from Tennessee

Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me

(423): View more from Tennessee

Put that in perspective

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(423): I will cut you (1-423): Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me (423): Put that in perspective http://tfl.nu/op5b

Replies (10) Good night (1795) Bad night (626)
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(303): View more from Colorado

why does he always try to puke into shot glasses

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(303): why does he always try to puke into shot glasses http://tfl.nu/7wx4

Replies (6) Good night (521) Bad night (1420)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.

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(608): Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple. http://tfl.nu/2rha

Replies (10) Good night (635) Bad night (2856)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.

(202): View more from Washington, DC

We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon

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(202): When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle. (202): We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon http://tfl.nu/62rc

Replies (6) Good night (1530) Bad night (553)
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(209): View more from California

Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....

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(209): Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage.... http://tfl.nu/5in8

Replies (2) Good night (844) Bad night (444)
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(309): View more from Illinois

Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.

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(309): Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros. http://tfl.nu/cejf

Replies (5) Good night (621) Bad night (309)

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