I don't think brook has ever known best
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
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