Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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