You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
