Porn is love you can see.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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