dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
