he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
