i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
