Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
