Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
