Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
