he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
