I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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