Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize
