if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
