If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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