Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
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