I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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