I love black thongs
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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