hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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