How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?