Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
