No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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