I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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