He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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