party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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