I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
