But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
