well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
