Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
People with herpes should wear stickers.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
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