so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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