5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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