State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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