You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
She is in my trunk
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize