i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Dick very happy bro
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
