To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
