I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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